Help for the Hurting

(Prov 25:20 NLT)  Singing cheerful songs to a person with a heavy heart is like taking someone’s coat in cold weather or pouring vinegar in a wound.

This morning we get back to our series entitled, “Unlocking the Power of Proverbs – Walking in the Wisdom of God.”  The Bible is amazing in that almost every passage I deal with seems to have universal application.  I can send out a message from one verse and 10 people reply to tell me how it specifically dealt with their situation, while all 10 situations are completely different.  There are times, however, when one verse may seem more timely than another.  Today is one of those times for me personally.

Saturday morning my family received news that my cousin, Nelson Monegro, a high successful attorney, college professor, and former Supreme Court Justice in the Dominican Republic, passed away.  He was just a few years older than me and our family is still in shock.  My mother and several of my cousins flew to the Dominican Republic the same day.  The wake was held on Sunday and the funeral was held yesterday.  The Dominican government formally honored my late cousin for the contributions he made to their society.  But honestly, that does little to help us, as a family, come to grips with his untimely death.  Nelson ate lunch at his mother’s house every Saturday.  My aunt had his lunch ready this past Saturday when she found out the terrible news.  This has been very hard on our family.  We spent the entire weekend weeping, praying, grieving, hurting, and mourning.  While Dominicans are normally a very festive people, now wound not be the time to attempt to stir up any festivities for my family.  Actually, one of my cousins in New York had a birthday party planned for his 1 yr. old on Saturday.  He still had the cake and the presents, but what would have normally been a loud and festive party, wound up being very quite and muted.

Right now I can definitely understand Solomon’s message.  My aunt has not eaten a thing since Saturday and she has not been able to stop crying.  For someone to come up to her right now and sing a festive song, with the supposed intent of cheering her up, would be untimely at best, and cruel, insensitive, provoking, and annoying at worst.  In Ecclesiastes Solomon explained that there is basically a time for everything.  He said there is “A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance” (3:4).  We must be able to discern the proper timing for things.  What we may consider to be the right thing, if done at the wrong time, can become the wrong thing.

So what does this mean to you today?  A few things:

1.  Be careful when dealing with a person with a heavy heart.  What you may think you are saying to sooth them, might actually add to their sorrow, if said the wrong way.

2.  What you think is the right thing, if done at the wrong time, becomes the wrong thing.

3.  As believers, not only should we rejoice with those who rejoice, but we should mourn with those who mourn (Rom 12:15).

4.  Be sensitive and considerate to all people, especially those who have a heavy heart.

5.  Be there for your brothers and sisters in Christ, especially when they are hurting, just don’t add to their hurt by saying/doing the wrong thing.

Closing Confession:  Father, I thank You for blessing me to be part of a universal Body of Christ.  I have brothers and sisters all around the world.  My global family is there for me and I am there for them.  We celebrate each other’s successes and we mourn each other’s losses.  We are never alone, because You are always with us, and we also have the blessed comfort of those You send our way to provide a shoulder to cry on, a helping hand, a listening ear, and a kind word.  I thank You for the discernment to know what to say, or what NOT to say, when my brother/sister is hurting.  I will be a blessing to them and never a burden.  I am there to build up, and never to tear down.  I declare this by faith.  In Jesus’ name.  Amen!

This is Today’s Word!  Apply it and Prosper!